We remind you that failure to provide timely adequate
restitution may result in your being eternally tormented by the demons, your
wife or your old boss.
Exclusive guarantee: If you are not satisfied with
the indulgence or the subsequent eternal life granted by the Holy See in
cooperation with the Lord our God, 100% of the value of your monetary
tribute will be refunded, no questions asked on resurrection day. You can
trust the Pope!
To reconsider the nature of your sin, please return to the
catalog.
Privacy policy. The administration of the Holy See
will not disclose under any circumstances the identity of the sinners who
purchase indulgences, except in direct communication with the Lord our God
through prayer. However, aggregate data regarding trends in indulgence sales
may be made available to investors by our quarterly report.
